In an audacious bid to actually write up events before they happen – we are going to shout about Simon Says Festival. It’s summer, we’re on a festival writing roll and when checking gig listings for our favourite new band, Simon Says came up again. So we are so fucking there!

How do we know it will be sweet sweet delicious juicy fun?

1. Ash Mammal are playing. They will probably have the best on stage performance of the entire weekend.

2. We went last year and got plastered out of our minds and met three people called Max all at the same time. That can only happen at special events.

3. Everyone who knows a good party in Leicester will be going – ergo, there will be no other good parties in Leicester that weekend.

4. We will be there – and this whole website assumes that we only go to the coolest places that everyone should go to because we say so. Or perhaps we go to loads of shit places too but don’t tell anyone about our off days where we instead end up walking out of Farmfoods with a 4-pack of K-cider and Thai Chilli Sensations (which must be packed full of the most addictive substance known to man, is it crack Walkers? Is it?! Have we been hooked in by some sort of crack?!). Obvs, the last part of that is a lie and we would never ever do anything like eat crisps and drink K.

Location: DeMonfort Hall –¬†